Little Moments

There is sound proof "baby lounge" in the back of the room our church meets in. Speaker in the corner, fan in the other corner, rocking chairs, and a one sided window create a pretty comfortable place to hang out on a sunday morning. There is normally someone nursing, someone with an overexcited baby, someone rocking their little one to sleep. It's a peaceful way to commune, whether or not conversation happens. You walk in the door and there is an understanding.

A couple months ago James and I were in said baby lounge with several other moms and babies. The musicians were playing a hymn that I cannot remember now and we could not hear the congregation loud enough to really sing along without it being a little awkward. however, one of the moms started singing, was it me? I don't remember. And the rest of the moms joined in quickly, as if to sigh together and agree with the lyric of the song. No one even sang timidly, which is why it seemed more than normal to be a sweet declaration of what we knew to be true, or what we needed to remember as truth, together. It was a really beautiful moment to witness.

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust thee, how I've proved thee o're and o're
Jesus Jesus precious Jesus, O for grace to trust thee more....

or maybe it was

I need thee, O I need thee, every hour I need thee
oh bless me now my Savior, I come to thee

I'm glad I noticed the moment when it happened and was able to breath a little deeper for a couple chorus's. I do wonder how often moments like that spring up out of nowhere and I miss them. Maybe because the room I'm in is not sound proof and distractions are not kept at bay. Or maybe I'm just not listening. Once again, in the fall, the leaves are reminding me to listen. To watch. What a treat it is to be the sole witness of a leaf falling from a tree. How many leaves must turn from green to yellow and then fall to the ground without anyone ever having witnessed it's beauty. How many songs sung together on a Sunday morning, without acknowledging the power (the necessity) of declaring truth, declaring need, together.

Walls

I was talking to two of my favorite women about decorating. I was saying how they have similar tastes and styles and would love each others homes. I was thinking about James and eyeing the door leading to the parking lot leading to our car which would take me home. I was holding my cell phone incase the sitter needed me. I was wondering what we are doing talking about decorations for our earthly homes. What a futile conversation. How can we even talk about this after such a heart wrenching night? But there we were, there I was, talking about it. I suppose if we don’t, we might just shrivel up and collapse right where we are from all the weight.

I was driving home and had enough time to listen to one short song so I chose Why it Matters by Sara Groves. I asked the question Why again, as I do most every day, most every conversation, most every dollar spent. Why?

Why the cooking. the cleaning. the eating. the sleeping. the mortgage. the lawn. the crown molding. the porch swing.

I think about a house we visited in Ecuador that sat above water which gave the children sores whenever they entered it. I think about their “kitchen” in the corner and the pots and pans neatly hanging on a wall made of sticks. The tub in the back where laundry was done. The magazine pictures and newspaper clippings where my framed pictures and paintings would be. I think of her eyes, the mothers. Her baby who she never let go of while we stood in her home and prayed for her family. The rug on the floor. The blanket folded on the cot where she sleeps.

I should think I will have had my fill of decorating by the time I am through here. There will be no mansion for me in heaven, no paintings or newspaper clippings to distract me from what is on the other side of the wall. Heaven for me will not be a room with my name on it, please God. I’ve had enough rooms, enough walls. Heaven, surely, will not need decorations.

Joyful Joyful

Last year I recorded The Silent Stars Christmas EP. This year I am adding 4 new songs and making it into a full record. I have enjoyed this whole process much more than I knew I would and probably my favorite part has been reinterpreting old hymns. There is so much depth to some of these old hymns. One of the songs I added this year includes verses from Joyful Joyful We Adore Thee. I love this quote from the author of the lyrics, Henry Van Dyke:

"These verses are simple expresions of common Christian feelings and desires in this present time—hymns of today that may be sung together by people who know the thought of the age, and are not afraid that any truth of science will de stroy religion, or any revolution on earth overthrow the kingdom of heaven. Therefore this is a hymn of trust and joy and hope."

Joyful, joyful, we adore Thee, God of glory, Lord of love;
Hearts unfold like flowers before Thee, opening to the sun above.
Melt the clouds of sin and sadness; drive the dark of doubt away;
Giver of immortal gladness, fill us with the light of day!

All Thy works with joy surround Thee, earth and heaven reflect Thy rays,
Stars and angels sing around Thee, center of unbroken praise.
Field and forest, vale and mountain, flowery meadow, flashing sea,
Singing bird and flowing fountain call us to rejoice in Thee.

Thou art giving and forgiving, ever blessing, ever blessed,
Wellspring of the joy of living, ocean depth of happy rest!
Thou our Father, Christ our Brother, all who live in love are Thine;
Teach us how to love each other, lift us to the joy divine.

Mortals, join the happy chorus, which the morning stars began;
Father love is reigning o’er us, brother love binds man to man.
Ever singing, march we onward, victors in the midst of strife,
Joyful music leads us Sunward in the triumph song of life.

4 NEW SONGS!

I recently recorded a few new songs that I am releasing through noisetrade for the next month or two! 3 of my own and one that I wrote and recorded with my friend Marc Scibilia. You can download them for free (and potentially win an ipod shuffle), or you can pay whatever you want. All of the money that comes in through noisetrade for this time will go straight to my cousins family. (details below)

From my October email:

For the next month or two, our Noisetrade beneficiary is going to be quite special! Alli's cousin Annie has a daughter named Natalie with Type II Spinal Muscular Atrophy and every dollar given through Alli's Noisetrade widget will go directly to Natalie and her family to help pay for medical expenses. SMA is a recessive genetic condition that disrupts the signal from the spinal cord to the voluntary muscles in the body, including those involved with supporting breathing. SMA is the number one genetic killer of babies, and at this time there are no FDA approved treatments. However, Natalie's parents say they are hopeful for the treatments that are in trial right now and they are looking forward to the progress of gene therapy. Natalie is an adorable 3 1/2 year old and is doing remarkably well, she is a joy to everyone around her! For more information on SMA, visit fightsma.org

AND the person that tells the largest number of friends about Alli's music through Noisetrade will get one of each of her records (including her records that are now out of print (One EP, At Sea: Live, and The Silent Stars EP) and a t-shirt absolutely free, the more friends you tell the better chance you have of winning! (please note that you must initiate the download process by clicking on the link in the confirmation email and then again on the following screen each time you "tell 5 friends" otherwise the system won't recognize how many people you've told, but then after that you can cancel the download).

At the end of the six months we will pick at random one monthly winner out of the six to receive a free iPod shuffle, "the brand new music player from apple that talks to you!" You can also post the free music widget (above) on your Facebook, MySpace, blog, website, and much more.

My friend Jenny has blogged recently about a 20 year old girl named Katie whose courage is an amazing inspiration. Katie is from Nashville and is living in Uganda raising 13 children that she has taken in as well as caring for hundreds of other children in her village. Did you read that? At 20 years old, she is raising 13 children in Uganda by herself.

With little help, she is feeding and caring for 1200 other children in the area. She is not there with an organization or with family, she is there by herself because at some point she could no longer stay still, stay silent. She had to go. I’m pretty intrigued by her story and want to ask you to check out Katies blog, and/or Jenny's posts about Katie.

From Jenny's blog:

“I ask Stacy what Katie needs...
Right now, she says, Katie needs to buy a piece of land and build a clinic next to her house so that she will stop bringing in sick babies and children off the street and into the living room with her other 13 children! They also need to build a few latrines. Apparently the 1200 children are stopping up the ONE toilet she has at the house. She needs $6,000 to buy the land. Then they need money to build a basic clinic.

Fine, I say. We will get the $6,000 and then we will start raising money for the clinic (which by the way has a waiting list over a year long of doctors and nurses who have already committed their time. They are simply waiting on a place to be built).”

So Jenny and her blog readers and going to raise at least $6,000 to help Katie with this project. Can you help? Do you know someone who can? I could not NOT share this story with you and at least ask you for prayers for this amazing woman. I'll blog again when Jenny has a specific place where you can send donations, but please feel free to contact Jenny directly about this.

"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom. Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
Luke 12:32-34

Katie's Blog
Jenny's Blog

Morning Read

What a teacher or librarian or parent can do, in working with children, is to give the flame enough oxygen so that it can burn. As far as I'm concerned, this providing of oxygen is one of the noblest of all vocations.

-Madeleine L'Engle from A Circle of Quiet.

and a few pages before,

I think that all artists, regardless of degree of talent, are a painful, paradoxical combination of certainty and uncertainty, of arrogance and humility, constantly in need of reassurance, and yet with a stubborn streak of faith in their validity, no matter what.

I do believe she is right. If you are a creative person of any kind and have not read any Madeleine L'Engle, you are missing out! Start here. Or here.

Definition

I am

a mother
sitting on a stool.
afraid of sharks.
still getting used to being an adult.
embarrassed by that last statement.

I am

a songwriter
annoyed by gum chomping.
tired.
looking out the window to see what Oso is barking at.

I am

a wife.
wondering what I should make for dinner.
excited that it is almost fall.
wishing I lived closer to family.
regretting the brownie I just ate. okay, the two brownies I just ate.

I am

a daughter, sister and friend.
always holding back..something
ashamed that I enjoy television so much.
a mediocre guitar player.

I am...

so many other things, yet none of these things.

I am not defined by anything other than:

For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.
Colossians 1:15-17